*CLICK-CLACK*
Don't you move a goddamn muscle. Thought you could sneak up on me, huh? Naw, I'm too sharp for that. 'Cause I've been preparing. Preparing... for them.
They're coming, but they're not gonna get me, not without a fight! Who's "they"? Doesn't matter! It could be an Alien Invasion, a Zombie Apocalypse, Black Helicopters from the gub'mint, the feral dregs of humanity, a divine being, some ancient evil or even butterflies! (Those are some nasty bastards.) But whatever they are, I'm prepared! I have me this bowie knife, tinfoil hat, good old two-barreled Betsy (plus her extended family), and a year's supply of food and water...
What? "Share"? "Help other survivors"? It's a dog-eat-smaller-yappy-dog world out there, "friend", and if ya ain't strong enough to defend yourself... Oh, I see what you're about, you want to stick a crazy dart in my neck and steal my stuff, don't you?! That's right, back away from the crazy person... Crazy-Prepared like a fox!
You want me to help you fight them? You can't fight them any more than an ant fights an elephant, everyone who tries ends up getting slaughtered! Ain't seen bloodshed like that since the war...
"Calm down"? I am calm! I am the very picture of calm! And rational, too! Wait a minute... you're one of THEM!
Don't you go anywhere, I'll go get the rest of my Untrusting Community to lynch you! No, better yet, my militia buddies! No matter how many orphans you save! I'll do what it takes to survive!
