Stories by @Jeshisthename

Everything Everywhere All At Once: 80s Edition

An aging Chinese immigrant is swept up in an insane adventure, where she alone can save the world by exploring other universes connecting with the lives she could have led.

RASL

A tightly wound mixture of science fiction, noir and conspiracy theories, RASL is a gritty, hard-boiled tale of an inter-dimensional art thief caught between dark government forces and the mysterious powers of the universe itself. When Rasl, a thief and ex-military engineer, discovers the lost journals of Nikola Tesla, he bridges the gap between modern physics and history's most notorious scientist. But his breakthrough comes at a great personal price. In this twisting tale of intrigue and betrayal, Rasl finds himself in possession of humankind's deepest, most dangerous secret. Originally serialized in black & white comic books and graphic novels, the award-winning completed novel is embellished with muted, smoky color by Steve Hamaker and Jeff Smith. Praised by The Village Voice, USA Today, NPR, Physics Today, Booklist, The Onion/AV Club, Paste, Publishers Weekly and more.

MouseHunt

When their father dies, Ernie & Lars inherit an old house and the family string factory. Lars, the loyal son, refuses to sell out the factory, which angers his wife, so she kicks him out. Ernie, who runs a five-star restaurant, is suddenly fired when a man dies while eating there. With no other place to go, the brothers shack up at the old house, suddenly realizing the place is worth a fortune! The boys decide to fix up the place and sell it in an auction, but first, they have to get rid of a mouse living in the walls. Sounds easy enough, right? Think again...

Bambi

It's spring, and all the animals of the forest are excited by the forest's latest birth, a buck fawn his mother has named Bambi. The animals are more excited than usual as Bambi's lineage means he will inherit the title of prince of the forest. Along with his mother, Bambi navigates through life with the help of his similarly aged friends, Thumper, a rabbit kit who needs to be continually reminded by his mother of all the lessons his father has taught him about how to live as a rabbit properly, and Flower, a skunk kit who likes his name. As different animals, they have their own issues and challenges which may not translate to the others. Being similarly aged, Bambi, Thumper and Flower may have to experience the uncharted phases of their lives without the knowledge or wisdom unless gleaned from those who have gone through them before. Bambi has to learn early that the lives of deer and of many of the other forest animals are not without their inherent dangers, for deer especially in the beautiful albeit exposed meadow. Bambi will also find that his ascension to prince of the forest is not a guarantee as other buck deer and situations may threaten that ascension.

The Clover Table

Set in Donegal at the height of the Irish Civil War, a pair of good friends (an aging violinist and a youthful farmhand) reconvene at a decrepit pub where they wax philosophical and power through tribulation with an array of colorful patrons.

The Triplets of Belleville

An orphaned boy, Champion, is raised by his grandmother, Madame Souza. Her gift of a tricycle starts a craze for cycle-racing that becomes the cornerstone of their life together. After years of relentless training, Champion makes it to the Tour de France, the toughest cycling event in the world. Alas, Champion and a handful of other top competitors are mysteriously kidnapped by a pair of sinister crooks with hangdog expressions. Supported by her faithful sidekick, her fat and flatulent dog Bruno, Madame Souza sets off to rescue her beloved Champion. An epic adventure leads them across the Atlantic to a vast seaport metropolis named Belleville, headquarters of the notorious French mafia. Lost and confused in the threatening darkness of the great city, Madame Souza and Bruno encounter the Belleville Triplets, who, in their youth, were a glamorous close-harmony act. Now, these three batty old women are now a bizarre jazz combo. Mme. Souza joins the band. At their very first gig, she discovers Champion is being held captive by the mafia Godfather himself! All hell breaks loose, and the chase is on! Do Mme. Souza, her dim dog, and the Triplets have what it takes to outsmart the ruthless French mafia and release poor Champion from its clutches?

Cash On Delivery

Michael Cooney’s riotous farce has all the ingredients for rib-tickling hilarity and offers a colorful selection of character roles. The hero, Eric Swan, has been laid off and never found the courage to tell his wife. Instead, he has invented a whole string of fictitious claimants living as lodgers at his home, and each week he cashes their benefit checks. Unfortunately, a man from the DSS arrives on the very morning that Swan, realizing the scam is getting out of hand, has announced that one of his lodgers has died. A grief counsellor arrives, hotly pursued by a marriage-relations expert and an undertaker. As a result, Swan and his reluctant collaborator, Norman McDonald, have to invent a whole repertory company of fake identities and fictitious family relationships, and there are delirious passages when everyone on stage seems to be talking at cross-purposes. The panicky mayhem kicks in early and never lets up, and the ludicrous plot is developed with an insane logic that touches on the inspirational. And while the play’s subject matter is topical, the farce is as reassuringly familiar. Huge-chested old boots are groped in the mistaken impression that they are chaps in drag, dead bodies that aren’t really dead are subjected to terrible indignities and Michael Cooney seems touchingly convinced that he is the first writer ever to have considered the comic possibilities of the word “Uranus”.

The Scarlet Letter

Set in Puritan Massachusetts Bay Colony during the years 1642 to 1649, the novel tells the story of Hester Prynne, who conceives a daughter through an affair and then struggles to create a new life of repentance and dignity. Containing a number of religious and historic allusions, the book explores themes of legalism, sin, and guilt.

Twice Upon A Time

Once upon a time, there were some people called the Rushers of Din. Each night as they slept, sweet dreams were delivered to them from sunny Frivoli, while nightmares came to them from the mysterious Murkworks. But the malevolent master of the Murk, Synonamess Botch, was not content. He wanted the Rushers to have non-stop nightmares. To do that, he would need to gain control of the Cosmic Clock. To accomplish this, he kidnaps the deliverers of the dreams, Greensleeves and the Figmen of Imagination, and then tricks Ralph, the All-Purpose Animal and his pal Mumford into stealing the mainspring from the Cosmic Clock. Realizing they've been tricked, Ralph and Mumford try to get the spring back and prevent Botch from unleashing his nightmare bombs. Along the way, they get help from their Fairy Godmother, Greensleeves' niece Flora Fauna, the junior varsity superhero Rod Rescueman, and Botch's own head nightmare writer, Scuzzbopper.

Bone

Meet the Bone cousins, Fone Bone, Phoney Bone and Smiley Bone, three misfits who are run out of Boneville and find themselves lost in a vast uncharted desert. They make their way into a deep, forested valley filled with wonderful and terrifying creatures. With the help of the mysterious Thorn, her tough-as-nails Gran’ma Ben and the Great Red Dragon, the boys do their best to survive in the middle of brewing trouble between the valley’s denizens. It will be the longest – but funniest – year of their lives!

The Subspace Emissary

The Subspace Emissary (Japanese: 亜空の使者 The Subspace Emissary) is a single-player game that is contained within Super Smash Bros. Brawl. It is a side-scrolling action game with a storyline that is said to emphasize character development. Most of the playable characters are protagonists, including Pokémon universe characters Pikachu, Pokémon Trainer, and Lucario. Jigglypuff also appears, but only after completing the game's plot and has no role in the storyline. The characters form teams based on the development of the story. All hidden characters can be unlocked by simply playing through The Subspace Emissary, though three of them (including Jigglypuff) only appear through secret doors that appear after the main plot has been completed. A second player can join in at any time, though the camera will focus on player one. Like Classic Mode and All-Star mode, the difficulty level can be changed, but unlike those modes, the difficulty level can be altered after the challenge has begun. In order to obtain trophies of the enemies in this game, the player must throw a Trophy Stand at them. This acts similarly to a Poké Ball, as it "captures" the opponent only when they are at low health. Trophy Stands also work against bosses, such as Rayquaza.

The Rescuers

A bottle containing a plea for help arrives at the Rescue Aid Society, an organization of mice from all over the world whose mission is to help those in need. Bernard and Miss Bianca are chosen for the task and after gathering the needed clues and information, they fly on the back of albatross Orville to the gloomy and uncharted Devil's Bayou. There, together with Ellie Mae and other swamp folk, they must work together to save a little orphan girl from the evil Madame Medusa.

The Batman (90s Edition)

When the Riddler, a sadistic serial killer, begins murdering key political figures in Gotham, Batman is forced to investigate the city's hidden corruption and question his family's involvement.

The Amazing Randi

A whirlwind exploration of the life and career off stage magician James Randi, his numerous accomplishments and the high-end challenge that exposed one phony psychic after another.

Ben and Arthur

A gay man recently married to the love of his life must stand against his homophobic brother, who's just been ostracized by his church.

Postnatal

A young woman's life is completely uprooted by the birth of her newborn child, only for her perception of reality to suddenly undergo a draconian metamorphosis.

The Lost Causes of Bleak Creek

It’s 1992 in Bleak Creek, North Carolina—a sleepy little place with all the trappings of an ordinary Southern town: two Baptist churches, friendly smiles coupled with silent judgments, and an unquenchable appetite for pork products. Beneath the town’s cheerful façade, however, Bleak Creek teens live in constant fear of being sent to the Whitewood School, a local reformatory with a history of putting unruly youths back on the straight and narrow—a record so impeccable that almost everyone is willing to ignore the suspicious deaths that have occurred there over the past decade. At first, high school freshmen Rex McClendon and Leif Nelson believe what they’ve been told: that the students’ strange demises were all just tragic accidents, the unfortunate consequence of succumbing to vices like Marlboro Lights and Nirvana. But when the shoot for their low-budget horror masterpiece, PolterDog, goes horribly awry—and their best friend, Alicia Boykins, is sent to Whitewood as punishment—Rex and Leif are forced to question everything they know about their unassuming hometown and its cherished school for delinquents. Eager to rescue their friend, Rex and Leif pair up with recent NYU film school graduate Janine Blitstein to begin piecing together the unsettling truth of the school and its mysterious founder, Wayne Whitewood. What they find will leave them battling an evil beyond their wildest imaginations—one that will shake Bleak Creek to its core.

Recasting Tom Holland

I love Tom Holland as much as the next guy, but he kind of gets cast in everything. Not even because he's the right man for the job, but because he's a hot ticket at the box office. Which begs the question, who else could've played some of his most notable characters if he weren't available. No offense to Tom, but you know-- why not.

Martians

An intergalactic crew of a aliens planning to invade the planet Earth are accosted by an elusive extraterrestrial race with far more destructive plans.

Fall of the Seat of the Muses

A dramatization of the rise and fall of the Great Library of Alexandria from the perspective of those who aided in its construction and the many who witnessed its destruction.