Fan Casting Floribunda and the Best Men

Plus-sized florist Floribunda "Flori" Alexandris has no idea why Pen Swan should invite her to be a bridesmaid at her wedding, but she agrees anyway. At the church, she encounters the two best men; the biggest Scottish ginger she's ever seen and a cool blond Sir Galahad type. She has no idea which one she should shake hands with first, or whose hand to accept for the bridal waltz. Flori likes the look of them both, but that's nothing to their magnetic reaction to her. How to choose? The men have their own creative solution, but there's something exceedingly odd about Hamish McTavish and Gervais St Clair. They don't offer to drive her van, and when she runs off the road in the middle of the night, no mention of women drivers crosses their lips. So that settles it. They can't possibly be human.